Chapter 2:Ignorance shattered 

The day after my mother had told us what had happened to our grandparents, was filled with somber conversations, and talks of what they had done and who they were. We had one of my mother’s siblings and their family stay with us. They had three children the youngest a boy around 14 and two girls who were two or four years older my memory is a tad hazy on them. I had my own bedroom so I stayed in there mostly during the next couple of days because I could not understand everything that was going on. I had always pestered my older brother about wanting to play games with him and his friends but he always ignored me. I should mention that we also had my great aunt sue staying with us as well as some of my mother’s cousins who were quite young. They were around my brothers age and all male between the ages of 10-13. I was six years old at this time. On around the third day I pestered my brother to let me play a video game with him and my 2^nd cousins but he said no. I asked if I could just watch and he said no. on the fourth day my cousin who was 14 and a boy asked me if I wanted to play a game. I was so utterly gleeful because he was older than my brother and he thought I was cool. Little did I know that my merriment would soon turn to ash. I asked him where we were going to play and what were we going to play. He told me we were going to play a question game and that we could play it in my room. I being the naïve 6-year-old I was didn’t protest and was intrigued. He took me to my room and locked the door, he then sat on my bed, I had a bunk bed with Scooby doo sheets and pillow cases. I stood in front of him. I asked him what the rules were for this game he said that he would ask a question and if I got it right he would take off a piece of clothing, but if I got it wrong I would have to take off a piece of clothing. We played the game for about 10 minutes. First I had to remove my whinnie the pooh t-shirt, then he took off his shirt. I only had underwear and pants on so when I lost those he still had clothes. He told me I would have to play with his special area if I wanted to win the game and get to leave otherwise he was going to tell my parents I had done something wrong. I have blocked out most of that day. I remember waking up the next day and not knowing if what had happened the day prior had actually taken place. I told my grief ridden mother about what had happened, I remember her asking my cousin if he did anything and he said no. I remember my mother believing his lie over my truth. And I can remember my heart shredding to pieces’ as I felt like the most alone person in the world. On the 5^th or 6^th day a little glimmer of light shined my dad’s parents were there, and best my fantastic loving grandmother was there, still shaken up from the day’s prior events I did not hug my grandmother and was at first worried she would be mad at me. Than my grandfather told me that it is perfectly polite to greet someone with an extended hand too. He made me relaxed so for the rest of the time before the funeral I stayed in my room with the door locked, plagued with nightmares when I slept or even closed my eyes. Over time I had learned to block out the event until an incident much farther in the future made it return in splendid horror. But back to the funeral, thousand upon thousands of people came to the funeral of my mother’s parents. They had been missionaries who had traveled to over 150 countries, they were great philanthropists. My grandfather was an orthopedic surgeon as well as an author. My grandmother was always a missionary and loved her work. Sadly, they passed away on the 14^th of May in the year 2002 just two days before my eldest sister’s birthday. During the funeral I sat by my grandmother who I let hold my hand because I always felt safe with her whenever I would see her or even hear her voice. We listened as family and who I assume were friends came up on stage to glorify my mother’s dead parents. When the funeral was over I went home and sat on one of our couches just talking to my grandmother as she told me stories of her youth. These were my favorite times with her growing up because I always felt almost ethereal like my problems floated away and I was just in her stories without a care. My grandmother and grandfather left two days after the funeral and we said goodbye to them. It was and still is always incredibly hard for me to have to say goodbye to my grandmother, even if I know I’m going to see her again. She will always be the most important person in my life forever and always. For the next year life seemed to go by as normal, I had moved to a new school and had made friends and life seemed to be going well. But as you will learn my life only went well for very short periods of time.